thanksgiving 2010

spending time on the beach with best friends definitely brings the spirit of a grateful heart!

newport beach

balboa island

laguna beach

inspiration point

cooking the feast

feasting

..my pictures of the newport beach temple are loading distorted, so hopefully i can figure it out and add them later! :(

lazy sunday

cache found a comfy spot...
but maybe we need to teach or puppy some modesty..

hair update

 by popular demand (ya...one person), here's the latest photos of my crazy hair-do!

 

FAQ's:

Was your hair curly before?
Nope!  I always dreamed of curly hair - so I guess be careful what you wish for :)  Seriously, though, it really is fun, I love it.

Are you going to keep it short or grow it out?
I am for sure growing it out - but my hair grows slower than the average jane, so it's going to be a while. I miss running my fingers through my hair and having wispy bangs.  I miss putting it in a ponytail.  So, I'll grow it out for now, but I now have more confidence to chop it all of if my heart so desired, cause now I know how I look at all the stages!


I am so so grateful to have a full head of hair. I'm probably going to have some awkward stages while growing it out, but it's all in the adventure, I guess!  Even bad hair days are still hair days! :)

the best birthday present ever!  i'm still smiling about it...

thank you, dad!

can't wait to be with this princess for a whole week!

7.24.2010

pioneer day we spent on the beautiful bear lake with best friends and my sweet parents

beach babe

it's been way to long since i've done this.... a little nervous!!

darn wake

zach testin' the new wakesurf

hot babies in the front of the boat

mama the flag lady

burnt to a crisp

thanks for sharing your boat, dad!

one day

one missed workout this morning
one really sore throat
one cold coming on
one compact powder dropped and broken all over bathroom floor
one humid, gloomy morning
one sink full of dishes
one contact completely fogged up mid day
one really important deadline missed
one kid screaming for 45 minutes+
one deep breath...

but...

one day left of summer school
one year of teaching under my belt (whew!)
one day until vacation with
one awesome family!

wonderful

spring project

whoever lived in this apartment before us left us with a big mess in the backyard - dead grass (the little that was left), a dog run full of limbs and an old christmas tree, and rocks all over the place! we let the snow cover it up all winter, but after the dog came running in with muddy feet multiple times this spring, we just couldn't take it anymore!

thanks to some work (digging out old, horrible sod is not fun), a few trips to the dump and lots of raking and tilling we had a clean slate. using the rocks we dug up from all over, we divided out a section for a garden and threw down some sod.

how does it look?


(i mean..nothing compared to my parents yard, but at least it's not a mud hole in the back!)
we even bought a cute little reel mower (i know, eco-friendly, right?! :) and mowed it for the first time this week!


...now, if i could just get our vegetables to grow, we would be set! (i think i jumped the gun. amateur.)

missionary mitch

i just love this tall guy. can't believe he's 19 today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
...and next week leaves on his mission!!


sometimes i wish i could trade him places. the mission is the best.
good luck, snitch! so proud of you!

wellsville hike

enjoying the beautiful cache valley weather with a hike up in the wellsville mountains. cache had the time of his life - we could hardly keep up with him!

another beautiful princess came into my life!
i love you, baby girl quinn.


thanks for sharing your babies with me, sisters!

need a new hairdo?
just add a cute headband accessory!!
FANCY ME accessories now has a blog! check it out - you will want one of each!

..i'll order some as soon as i have hair to wear them in! :)

scars

at almost six months old, our poor puppy cache had to go through surgery to remove a cyst on his chest. he was so brave and recovered extremely fast! days after his sugery, i had a cyst removed too. ironic! unfortunately my recovery was fast, but a diagnosis of cancer led to chemo treatments and all the joys that come with that medicine.

gratefully, the chemo was a success and blood work came back showing no more cancer! hopefully it stays that way!!

six months later, cache had another cyst - this time on his little face. surgery again for him.

gratefully, it didn't test positive for cancer. lucky dog!

well guess who else needed surgery again? you guessed it - me! i think my dog and i like to suffer together! on a follow-up ultrasound and CT scan, a unknown 'mass' was found on the left side of my pelvic area. this time, luckily, it was NOT the size of a canteloupe as it had been last time. but - since fruit apparently is a good way to measure, this time it was an orange.

great. another cyst? do i still have cancer? am i going to lose my other ovary? what..is...it?
those questions couldn't be answered until it was OUT of my body.
this isn't fair, i initially thought.

no more surgical details are necessary. i'm recovering just fine and THRILLED i'm on spring break this week!

to put the cherry on top of it all - my doc called last night with the pathology report...

drum roll please..

the 'orange' sized mass was not a cyst at all! not cancerous! simply some swollen lymph nodes and extra tissue. not only that - it was in no way connected to my important organs i need to someday be a mommy!

i feel so so blessed. so many prayers, fastings and blessings have been offered on my behalf. i know the Lord knows me and what i need. he lets me learn what i need to learn, and then even lets me witness miracles. it's incredible! i may have lots of physical scars...but my testimony is not scarred at all - just strengthened.

thank you to EVERYONE who prayed for me and did many other things to bless my life these last six month. let's hope this is the beginning of the end of cancer for jaci!

isn't that little head so cute?
the little one.
this girl melts my heart. her perfect face, her adorable chubby legs. i just can't get enough.
and i love that she can share the same hair-do as me!


love you, skye.
i miss you.

house to home

oh, the joys of renting.
only so much you can do to make it feel like home.
here's our attempt..

LIVING ROOM BEFORE...

and AFTER!


KITCHEN BEFORE...

and AFTER!

dear cache:
i love you
but sometimes feel like getting your teeth removed.
please. stop. chewing.
you know that new cool harness i just bought you? ya, the one you just ate. it was expensive.
please stop.
good thing i still love you.
how could i resist when you look at me like this?
love,
me

hair

2 months ago, my hair was just getting to be the length i wanted it. ironic.
well, i saved this little piece.
actually zach told me i should keep a piece before he cut it all off.
i'm glad he did.
i look at it and feel it everyday.
it may sound silly, but i hold it up to my face to remember what it's like. i miss the feeling of my hair falling in my face or my fingers running through it. i miss using a flat iron, putting it up in a pony-tail and everything else i had always done without much thought.

i know it will all come back. but right now, i'll just hold on to this piece to help me remember.
and i don't think i'll every complain about my hair again...

bald and beautiful

here it is.
now there's nothing left to hide!
me in all my white headed glory.
i needed my bald brother in the photo with me.
if he can do it, so can i, right?

...now if i could just get my beard to grow in that thick...we'd really look like twins!

lots of people have asked,

how did you know something was wrong?
it was a process. almost a year ago i was having lots of stomach problems and some heart burn and such. i went to a doctor and he sent me home with antacids. it didn't help. i held out for about 3 months. then we had a busy summer of our trip to ecuador and going to live in arkansas with the patterson's for a couple months. through all the adventure, i just didn't feel good all around. my appetite was gone, and when i did eat it was in small amounts because it made me feel even worse. i was dropping lots of weight, but felt like CRAP. amidst all this, my stomach kept growing - similar to when you are pregnant. i couldn't 'suck it in' and it was hard and uncomfortable. i knew something wasn't right. i 'self diagnosed' myself (by reading things on the internet, of course!) with an ovarian cyst. the symptoms lined up.

when we got back to UT, i went to an internal medicine doctor, who referred me to an OB who did an ultrasound and discovered a cantaloupe size cyst on my ovary. he scheduled surgery and took a cancer blood test just to be safe. when those results came by high, he referred me to SLC to an ovarian cancer specialist. the blood test didn't determine that i had cancer, it just raises concern.

surgery was scheduled and the doc was fairly certain it would be benign. the larger tumors usually are, they say. so i didn't worry too much and just was grateful to get that thing OUT. i felt like 100 bucks once i had recovered. it took about 3 weeks after surgery for all the lab tests to come back. they discovered that the cells on the outer edge of the ovary tested positive for cancer. they were fairly confident that they had 'gotten it all' since surrounding organs and tissue tested negative. BUT - no one wants to have another tumor grow from any possible cell floating around in there, or worse, its spread to another part of the body.

HENCE, chemotherapy is to ensure that all cancer cells that could have remained are killed. i should be 'cured' and be back to normal in no time!


well...that was the long version. be careful what you ask for :)

they ask..i'll answer

what side effects have you had from chemo?
hair loss! but hey, showers are really short with no hair on your head and no need to shave! i kind of look like G.I. jane or something...only not so fit!
i wear a wig to work and church (which is uncomfortable and itchy), but all the other times i wear hats or head wraps. to be honest, it's actually quite liberating to be bald. less time getting ready in the morning.
besides hair loss, i get leg pains for a couple days after treatment, and i am always tired (but who isn't!)

do you feel sick?
nope. i am so so blessed. haven't had to take a nausea pill yet!! i actually feel pretty much normal. actually better than i did before surgery.

what can i do to help?
come visit! i especially love to hold babies if you have one!
suggestions for head coverings. bald can be beautiful - but it's cold!

how long do you have to do treatments?
i have already finished three! that's HALF WAY. i will be done by the end of february.

are you still working?
yes, and so grateful. i love my job and it keeps me busy...but i do come home exhausted!

what kind of cancer do you have?
i have stage 1 ovarian cancer. i have had one ovary removed and the other one is still healthy and good. stage 1 is the lowest - so it's curable and i should have a long, healthy life. this leads me to the question...

can you still bear children?
yes! as long as my other ovary keeps doin' it's job!!


(sorry if that was TMI for some of you...but everyone asks so i'll just put it out there!)


through this whole situation, i have just felt so grateful. i am grateful for my helpful husband who doesn't complain that his wife is always tired and still thinks i am beautiful. grateful for a body that is healing well and strong enough to fight this disease. grateful for a family who looks beyond a bald head and realizes i'm still good ol' jaci. grateful for children and my job that help me realize what really is important. hair is not one of them. grateful for SO many friends who have expressed love and concern for me!

2010 is going to be
a year of healing
a year of new adventure
a year of love
a year of miracles
a year of improvement
i'm.so.excited.

i have passed the hump of chemo - it's all easy sailing from here!


...any more questions?